Battle of the Bulge

To be a footballer would be to live the dream – but you do have to make sacrifices. Here are some who have really taken the freedom of retirement to heart – heart disease, that is…

This was prompted by a picture of Neil Shipperly I stumbled across – remember him? Battling striker who played for Chelsea, amongst others? Look at the transformation… (left is now, in case you didn’t realise)

Unfortunately Shipperley has also balded significantly, emphasising the ravages of age (believe me, I know how he feels). He’s not the only one fighting the fat though – not by a long way. It happens to current players as well – remember this slimline, promising 18 year old at Man City?

Yep, that’s the vaguely angelic looking Michael Johnson. Just look at him now…

Again baldness has accentuated his physical decline – but he appears to have aged twenty years in just two. And the greats are not immune either:

Ronaldinho there, showing that losing your hair and your slimline figure can be mutually exclusive. Whereas he’s retained his flowing locks, he’s certainly lost his definition.

A few other footballs who’ve packed on the pounds since quitting (in fairness, who can blame them – a life of restraint and abstinence must have an equal and opposite)…

I don’t think anyone is unaware of Maradona’s physical decline, but there it is in the starkest possible form. Not sure how much restraint and abstinence he employed though.

Mick Quinn was always a bit of a fatty, but now he’s absolutely enormous.

Big Nev is now REALLY Big Nev. And I can only presume that caption refers to his dinner.

Anyone who watched the FA Cup draw will have seen the adipose behemoth Neil Ruddock has become.

Recognise him, second from right?

Yep (assuming you said ‘Jamie Pollock’) – that’s Jamie Pollock. Remember him?

And lastly, our favourite Scandinavin fatty, Thomas Brolin – before…

And now:

We all know the footballers people rightly or wrongly abuse for being fat – Charlie Adam, Andy Reid (perhaps the heaviest centre midfield partnership the Premier League has seen?), Wayne Rooney, and of course ‘Fat’ Frank Lampard – but they have nothing on the above. Where Jan Molby led, others have followed. And I for one, salute them.

Any other obeasts spring to mind? Comment below or drop us a line on contact@footballsup.com.