Didier Drogba: Despicable ****

Heartbreak for Chelsea last night as they went out on away goals thanks to Andres Iniesta’s 93rd minute strike. It’s difficult to feel sorry for them, though – Ballack’s haranguing of the ref, Terry’s aggressive bleating, and worst of all Drogba’s disgusting behaviour make most Englishmen happy to seem them go.

But it is Drogba who wins in the hate stakes, and by a country mile as well. We’ve talked about our hatred of the petulent Ivorian before – see here – but that fire of hatred has been reignited in spades.

Across the two legs, there were three moments of typical Drogba that, in a microcosm, encapsulated the type of player, person, and man he is.

Number 1 – The Rollover

In the first leg, Chelsea, having parked the bus, were clinging grimly onto a 0-0 stalemate. Drogba goes down under an (obviously) innocuous challenge, and rolls over in apparent agony as he is wont to do. However, he rolled so far that he actually left the field of play, allowing the game to continue and denying the stoppage and timewasting he was going for. His reaction? To roll back onto the pitch. Having left the field of play, he came back on, at which point the referee had to stop the match. It was not really commented upon at the time, but it was truly disgusting cheating.

Number 2 – The Facial

This time in the second leg, Drogba goes down again, again under an innocuous challenge. This time neither the referee nor the players fall for his pathetic histrionics, and play continues. Drogba looks up, baffled that his ‘tactics’ have not worked. Then it dawns on him… play has to stop for a facial injury! So, moving from clutching a non-specific area of his leg, he moves to clutching his face – and play has to stop, breaking up Barcelona’s momentum, and giving Chelsea breathing space. Revolting.

Number 3 – The Crybaby

I can barely begin to describe Drogba’s actions upon the final whistle last night. They are that childish, pathetic, stroppy, spoilt… only the video can do it justice. People react better to death, starvation, destruction… he had just drawn a football match, for God’s sake!

Hopefully, if you didn’t know already, this has convinced you what an abhorrent human being Didier Drogba is. The strange thing is, Chelsea fans absolutely adore him. Would you feel the same if he was lining up against you?

Drogba, his antics and the fans’ affinity for him, are a major reason behind Chelsea’s huge unpopularity. Never have I jumped off the sofa to celebrate an English side’s demise before – Drogba drove me to it.